Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(661): View more from California

Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,

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(802): View more from Vermont

Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life

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(810): View more from Michigan

Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(802): View more from Vermont

i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.

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(815): View more from Illinois

im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.

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(478): View more from Georgia

Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420

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