And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize