if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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