Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
