Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
