Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
