i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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