you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
