On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
