But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
