Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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