Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
