I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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