HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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