Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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