yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
