Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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