This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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