I accidentally had phone sex last night
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.