I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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