Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.