how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
