rhymes with "ouble enetration"
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize