everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
