im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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