did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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