Can Purell be used as lube?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
