I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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