I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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