So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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