Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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