You just made me feel so damn special
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
