hell yes lets make some ravioli
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
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