i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
