real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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