just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
she looked like the before picture.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
