i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
either way he was missing a nipple.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
