She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
