I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
