so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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