Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
