he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
