At least make sure they are 18
Why
Me too!
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I made him laugh his dick is mine
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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