The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
This is classic penis vs brain.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize