On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize