My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I will pee on everything he values.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
