haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
one might say we're banned from that church
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize