I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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