those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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