I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
