so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
